No funny stories today, just a heartfelt update. 

The other day, we completed our first ever, successful project together. Meaning both boys actively enjoyed the project, working together, without tantrums. When I got pregnant, I had visions of my babies and I coloring together, playing ball and other kid stuff…together. But because of the boys different needs, we’ve been doing one on one preschool projects; Judah and I working in the mornings and then while he did therapy, Jacob and I would work together. Even so, I’ve really wanted the boys to work together on at least some of their activities and it’s slowly happening.

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I ran out of concealer yesterday morning. I scraped and pawed at the container like a savage hyperventilating bear mauling it’s last honeycomb and finally caked enough under my eyes to fool the outside world into thinking I was not dead. I avoided fluorescent lights at all costs. I had just enough self confidence to stare down the condescending hipster as I drove Judah to school, windows down, Justin Bieber blaring (yeah Judah’s back in love with his song) but not enough to face fluorescent lights. It would have been too much.

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I’ve started writing five different times, each with different stories and titles and I’ve backspaced every sentence. I’m in the mood to write, yet I want it to be meaningful, not slummed together without thought. I want quality and I want words that matter, but all my fingers can type out are the small morsels. I worry, as if writing about the little things isn’t meaningful; Fearful that it will sound redundant because if ever there was a dead horse being beaten, it’s my mantra of treasuring the little things.

The thing is, life’s lessons are mostly found in the little things. The redundant things tweak the moral of our stories just enough so we grasp their meanings a little deeper each time. Like holding hands with Josh in the car, and having a random, hazy flashback of our dating years before two little bodies occupied the back seat. Thinking of our hopes and dreams then, and seeing where we are now. It forced the worried what-ifs of life to the side and I felt it deeper than before, the gratitude and joy. We’ve held hands in the car a million times before, but somehow this time, it  marinated in my heart a little longer and settled in deeper; And  I needed it.

After Judah’s IEP meeting Thursday, I spent yesterday afternoon bent over his file, shuffling through paper documents and clicking through school emails. The meeting, initially set to schedule Judah’s compensatory services for Occupational and Physical therapies (a combined total of around 880 minutes) ended without anything being scheduled. It’s the second time we’ve all cleared our schedules and met for this purpose and the second time that no one in that meeting has been authorized to set the schedule. Along with the districts previous violations of special ed law, this incident is that proverbial last straw. But in the middle of paper shuffling and clicking, worrying and flashing forward to twenty years and the what-ifs regarding Judah, I remembered that brief hazy moment in the car. I felt it again, the deeper gratitude and joy. The what-ifs are there, the worries of twenty years down the road are there and they are real, but even deeper and more solid is the richness of what is now.

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I’d just put the coffee on. Blindly feeling around the darkened kitchen for filters and crossing my fingers as I poured the water, hoping I wouldn’t miss and splatter the counter tops. Mostly successful, I inhaled the brew as it waifed from the kitchen to the living room, enveloped in the morning dark, accompanied by little boy’s voices from the hallway bedroom. While I don’t relish waking at 5am, there’s something reverent about the very early morning moments.

And it’s in these moments of peace and stillness, before the toys in the hallway bedroom are tossed around and toddler rants are chanted, that I offer thanks for the moments we’ve had and set up prayers for the ones to come. I think over the previous days, remembering. Having Josh to ourselves for a bit, the cozy rain-day that kept us in our pajamas, date night, oh and that time when I sent a text to my father-in-law that was actually meant for my girlfriend. !!!!

Yes, one of those texts; Meant only for a girlfriend’s eyes – containing quippy, jovial, yet personal girl-kind details. I believe the words “lady time” were used. Yes, as in reference to that monthly visitor.

Messages had been flying back and forth between Josh’s family and I, chatting about Josh’s upcoming job decisions and other such details. How my thumb fingers clicked on what was clearly labeled as Dad Inkenbrandt instead of Sara I have no clue, but what doesn’t kill you (and I did almost die of mortification) makes you stronger. And makes you thank the good Lord above that your father-in-law has the sense of humor needed to roll with his son’s wife and her mortifying laps of brain activity. If I haven’t mentioned this before, I have in-laws who are hilarious, amazing and gracious and have made me their own. But still! Mor-ti-fying!

If your goal is to lose all pride and one day become the woman who never gets embarrassed, I suggest starting with an embarrassing text to your father-in-law. It’s a good jumping off point. 

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I found this tennis ball DIY on pinterest, of course. The whole blog is in Chinese, but there are some other cute DIYs on there as well.

Originally I wanted to use them outside to hang our buckets and shovels and other toys that usually get lost, but Jacob insisted he and Judah needed them to hang their coats.

If I were putting these in the boy’s room, I would have used something else for the eyes, but as it is, the thumb tacks are hard to pull out and we’ve screwed them into the kitchen wall near the shoe pile, so I can supervise their use. One more step towards organization.

Hope your weekend has been great!

I love the high waisted swim suits that are around this year, but aside from the trip to Florida we’re planning to take this Summer, I rarely ever have need of a suit. So, instead of spending the extra money, I thought I’d DIY one from my old one piece. I loved the suit as a one piece, except, as with most, I kept having to pull it up and readjust the umm…chest area. Genetics. I figured I could tailor it a little better if I separated it. After hemming, adding elastic and bra hooks, I decided to add fabric ties to the back mainly to cover the bra hooks that showed just a tiny bit.

I spared you the real life modeling of the suit, just take my word for it. It fits and looks great and with only a tiny bit of skin showing. Modest is hottest. :)

This weekend I spent Saturday with Malisa. We visited some shops and ate ice cream before lunch. It was fabulous. The more we hang out, the more I think we were separated at birth. It’s a really wonderful thing to find a friend who is open and honest and who you see eye to eye on in more than just superficial things. But it’s also great when Malisa drives past an open house and does a quick u-turn so we can walk through it. I always want to walk through open houses, but never have the chance. Such a fun day!

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Josh claims I have weird taste in smoothies, he’s more of a traditional guy. I love anything with coconut and pineapple, even better if there’s a little citrusy splash of lemon. This was the drink I really wanted to make, but I couldn’t find all the ingredients, not to mention, sugar overload. My version still has it’s fair share of sugar, but I conned myself into thinking it’s healthy because there’s actual fruit.

Also, I’m now a real blogger. I’ve taken and posted the token drink-with-paper-straw photo. (Malisa and I found the straws and about a million other “Ooo-Ahhh!” worthy things in Daisy’s on Saturday)

Happy 4th of July! 1. What are your favorite smoothie/slushy drinks? 2. How are you celebrating today? I know the U.S. of A. isn’t perfect but I sure do love our nation. We’re biking to our town’s parade and grilling some burgers.

p.s. Jacob is probably more in love with these straws than any blogger.

I kind of wish coolots were in style still. I mean, were in style. Because unless you were a part of Maranatha Baptist’s athletic program, they were never in style. And yeah, in case you were wondering, the majority of my high school years included coolots. I had three brothers, a cop for a dad and a drawer full of coolots. How many dates do you think I went on? We won state though, so, there’s that.

Anyway, it’s hard to chase after a three year old and assist your almost five year old (5 year old?! We’ll talk about that later) on the playground in a dress. Let’s not even discuss trying to contain and resolve tantrums in one. But it’s also hot and the closest thing to shorts I own is a skirt…hence the desire to just sew up the middle and swish around in some coolots.

I would never.

But I would wear a fanny pack. I’m not even kidding.

I love this dress though and think I’ll probably wear it every day this Summer – with bloomers underneath or something. (It’s from TJ Maxx)

Before we did the responsible errands, like shopping for actual food to put on our empty pantry shelves, Jacob and I detoured to the Thrift store. He picked out a firetruck book and I got the above. We literally have one pot, one skillet and two odd sized glassware casserole dishes; Not to mention we’ve broken at least three, maybe four, of our cups recently, which doesn’t bode well for the ones I just bought, but I couldn’t resist. I’m not big on cooking, I think if you’ve read the blog at all you probably know that already, but I figured we should start beefing up our pots, pans and casserole dishes just in case we host Thanksgiving this year (hint, hint family!)

I’m glad we stopped in and found some treasures. Since we always go right after we drop Judah off at school, the shop is empty save one or two other early risers and it’s nice to roam around for a little bit, and even nicer when the 20% off sign is in the door.

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I have this friend. She sometimes mails me some of her fabulous thrifty finds and makes me tear up at how thoughtful she is. Like she knows how I need preschool ideas for the boys, so she includes some books filled with awesome preschooler activities and a vintage granny dress and says things like “Oh I saw this bag and it just looked like you” as if she didn’t just mail me the most fabulous bag ever. She’s a keeper…and not just because she mails me gifts :)

Speaking of friends, I had a girls morning with some new-ish friends. Normally Joyce and I get together with our kids for play dates, but we finally got together with two other ladies, sans the kids, and had brunch and did a little consignment shopping. How fancy are we, doing brunch?

In all honesty, I’m usually a homebody, but getting out and laughing, meeting a new friend and stuffing my face with pancakes, it was just what I needed. Even if they don’t want to, I’m going to force them to do it again on a regular basis…you can force people to hang out with you right?

Thanks to Josh for encouraging me to take some time for myself and for making sure the house and kids are calm and clean when I get home…that takes skills. A good start to the weekend, how’s your’s?

p.s. sometimes you just need to feel fancy and wear every pattern and color you own. yesterday was that day. :)